The Breakup

Navigating the End of the Employer-Employee Relationship.

At some point in every professional relationship, we encounter a crossroad. Sometimes, it’s a transition to a new opportunity. Other times, it’s the realization that the employment relationship is no longer working for either party. In HR, we often refer to this as the "breakup" between employer and employee. The end of the employment relationship. And much like any breakup, it can be complicated, emotional, and challenging for both sides.

As the Head of HR for a consulting firm that works with diverse industries and workplaces, I’ve observed this process from all angles. Whether it’s the employer initiating the departure, the employee making the decision to move on, or a mutual understanding that things have run their course, there are consistent themes that emerge—difficulties, frustrations, and (hopefully) respectful closure. When it's employer initiated, I can't stress enough that it NEEDS to be a respectful meeting.

The Difficulties of Saying Goodbye

Ending an employment relationship can be difficult for several reasons. For the employer, there’s often the tension between business needs and personal empathy. The decision to terminate isn’t typically made lightly; it can impact team dynamics, morale, and workload distribution. On the employee’s side, the loss of security, professional identity, and financial stability can create significant stress and uncertainty.

In many cases, both parties wrestle with a sense of disappointment. Perhaps performance didn’t meet expectations. Maybe the role evolved beyond what was initially promised. Maybe there were errors that cost the businesses a substantial amount of money, there weren't realized until an audit happened.

These situations are often emotionally charged and can lead to feelings of frustration and resentment if not handled thoughtfully.

Understanding Frustration of Contract

One concept that’s helpful to understand in these situations is frustration of contract.

This occurs when unforeseen events make it impossible for the terms of the employment contract to be fulfilled, through no fault of either party.

For example, if an employee becomes permanently unable to perform their duties due to a serious illness, the contract may be considered "frustrated". Similarly, if a business shuts down unexpectedly due to external factors, the employment relationship may be deemed legally frustrated.

Frustration of contract isn’t a decision either party makes voluntarily. It’s a recognition that circumstances have fundamentally changed, making the original agreement no longer viable. In legal terms, this often means neither party is considered at fault, and typical severance entitlements may differ from standard terminations. I'm not a lawyer, but the employment contract can be 'frustrated' and usually (from my experience), payments have been issued to the departing employee.

The feeling is Mutual: A Respectful Parting of Ways

In an ideal world, employment separations happen through a mutual agreement. This is when both the employer and employee come to a shared understanding that the working relationship is no longer beneficial for either side.

These conversations are often grounded in respect, open communication, and a genuine desire to support each other’s next steps. This would be seen as a "No Hard Feelings" approach because of the level of respect that both parties have for one another.

A mutual agreement might result in a negotiated resignation, a severance package, or even a collaborative transition plan where the employee stays on temporarily to ensure a smooth handover. These types of breakups tend to preserve professional reputations, maintain positive references, and even leave the door open for future collaborations.

Just this week, I've had the conversation with a few people about this type of departure.

Why the Process Matters

Whether it’s an involuntary termination, employee initiated resignation, frustration of contract, or mutual agreement, how we handle these "breakups" speaks volumes about our organizations. As HR professionals and leaders, our role is to ensure the process is respectful, transparent, and aligned with both legal obligations and the Company’s values.

At our firm, we strive to foster dignity in these moments. We coach leaders to deliver honest feedback with empathy during conversations with their staff. We help employees navigate next steps, offering career transition support when possible. And we aim to leave the relationship in a place where both sides can move forward without regret.

Because at the end of the day, the end of one chapter often leads to new beginnings - for both the employee and the employer.

Should your Company be experiencing issues with your staff, we offer this support to our SMEs. Be Proactive, Not Reactive.

Sincerely,

Carmelinda